THE MAGNET

Greetings Hairballers,

It’s been a crazy couple of weeks.  Sorry to be a day late. I came home yesterday afternoon to no air conditioning.  Getting that at least limping along took most of the night.

THE MAGNET©

         FMHorner

What’s going on--

am I fly paper?

they do still make it,

I saw it in the Dollar Store

or, are some planets

squared to mine,

those baddies like

Saturn and *Pluto

perhaps it’s karma

from another lifetime--

when I was someone else

and so were you

like metal shavings to a magnet,

you soar up and stick to me,

hurt souls clamoring

for attention

okay, I’m sorry for what I did

in that other incarnation,

when I was Emperor of Rome

and fed you to the lions.

*Poor old Pluto was downgraded to a rock by some government know-to-all, but I’m not buying it.

Hairballs,

f

OMG OF THE WEEK

CNN, the station that has had crystal ball gazers working the Malaysian airliner story 24/7, out did itself today.

The anchor asked one of the experts how this could happen.  He replied, “we don’t know what happened exactly but it is certain that someone did something.”

How much are they paying this man?

Hairballs to them.

f

OMG OF THE WEEK

CNN has run a short feature of a man showing how to make a false passport at least six times--maybe more, I don’t watch it constantly.

Since they can’t get news right, have they turned to educational TV?

Back to the NHL channel for me.

Hairballs!

f

Sitting on Frozen Peas

Greeting Hairballers,

Daylight Savings Time has me up and rattling about.  Even though I forgot to change the clock, the cat came in to do spin the lampshade over my head at 8 or 9 am, depending on what time zone he was in--so up I got.

We all have our dents and dings, mine is a pinched nerve.  How?  Living life I suspect.  Surely not from all the years of wearing high heels, as I know at least 12 men with the same problem--unless they were dressing differently when I wasn’t around.

Here, my feelings and solution.

Sitting on Frozen Peas©

         FMHorner    

lodged above my left butt cheek

the pinched nerve, Aggravaine,

waits with the patience of Fafner  

for the awkward push of a vacuum,

the schlepping of groceries up the steps,

the hauling of cat

when she stirs, it’s feet up the wall

then sit on a pack of frozen peas

while sipping an Irish whiskey on ice

till Aggravaine sleeps again

If hairballs would fix it, I’d hack up a bucket full,

f